Fugly Feet?

Do you have callouses larger than some of your toes? Dry heels with cracks big enough to store your spare change in?

Say goodbye to your foot woes....forever...or at least for the summer.

I have developed a sure fire way to have beautiful smooth feet....WHILE YOU TAN!!!!

First you will need to locate an "Old School" public pool.

The kind with the rough cement bottom that made your feet bleed as a kid. If you arrive at a public pool and do not see bandaid wrappers in the trash can you need to find a new pool.

Pack your children and all of their pool accoutrement, don't forget the water proof bandaids, and prepare to spend at least 90 minutes at the pool.

This is no-guilt beauty. The kids are perfectly entertained and will not need you to do a thing but "watch this" for the next 90 minutes (as long as they know where the band aids are and how to apply them).

Relax, tan...and when it is time to go...

90 minutes in the pool will have softened up even the most skanky feet, drag them on the bottom of the pool as you make your way to the ladder. You will need to make sure that you get the sides and bottoms for maximum exfoliation.

Yeah you are going to look pretty strange...but people will probably think you are just peeing in the pool, nothing gross like scraping off an inch of funky foot skin.