Monday, November 5, 2007

Bite Me Big Book

I found this in the Toys-R-Us Big Book and was stunned:
Speed Stacks Glow in the Dark StackPack with DVD-$29.99

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

I went to the web page to find out more information...there had to be more to this...nope. Essentially you get a set of plastic cups and a mat to stack them on that times you.

I was flummoxed...cup stacking, really? What a scam. Then I thought I would share this little joke with the kids....dumb...dumb...dumb..

I showed them the picture and immediately their little hands start flying around in a "stacking" motion. They are all, "Oh yeah Mom those are awesome....it is supposed to be so much fun....we would love some...." This only proves that just when you think you have a clue...your kids will be right there to prove that you don't...

Have you ever watched Eddie Murphy Raw? Do you remember the part where he was talking about wanting a McDonald's hamburger and his Mother made him a homemade one? Here is the clip:


That is exactly how the FlyingMonkeys must have felt at the end of our "speed stacking conversation," it went a little something like this:

Me: Why would I spend $30 for cups??? We have everything you need to do that already...

FM: Uh uh....

Me: Yeah huh...look I have 12 of these plastic "stacking cups" I got at Wal-Mart and they were only $3



FM: Ummmmm, well ok then. What about a timer so I can see how fast I can do it?


Me: Already got one...

FM: Really! Where?

Me: Right there...look-


FM: Wha! Huh? Mom! Our microwave won't "time" us it just counts down stuff...


Me: So...Set if for 10 minutes and get your Brother to hit stop when you are done stacking...then use some of this scrap paper to subtract the remaining time from 10 minutes and viola! A timer that will help you with your math skills!


***at this point I am hearing lots of grumbling and they are starting to look at me like Michael Richards doing stand-up at an elementary school***


FM: Um...we still need a stacking mat....


Me: Oh, we have one of those too...and it is not a stinky little one like in the Big Book. Ours is a competition quality surface that allows multi players!


FM: REALLY! AWESOME! Where is it?


Me: Right here-

I take a moment to rub in my "Big Book Victory" - I am all standing at the table stacking my imaginary cups with speed that looks like something out of the Matrix. I start with the sound effects, "cha cha cha cha cha clink" and yell "DONE." I look at my fake watch and announce my time-2.4 seconds...it's a new record.


Hey Toys-R-Us Big Book...I am winning!...HOW YA LIKE ME NOW!


Then MonkeyBoy points out, with a smug look on his face, "The one from the store comes with an instructional DVD..."


I led them into my office and with one click of the mouse pull the coup de grace onto my screen........http://speedstacks.com/howTo.php - that's right...a free, step by step tutorial on cup stacking!!!!!!!


~I win, I dance, I run back to our multi player competition quality stacking surface to beat my old record with my imaginary cups...I am flailing my arms wildly...picture Tom Cruise in Cocktail...I begin to sing..."Shake it, don't break it..it took yo mama 9 month's to make it..."

All of a sudden....it is dark. Pitch black dark....and I hear....

"Huh.....the ones from the store glow in the dark...."

7 comments:

Mrs. Schmitty said...

My 9 year old so wants those stupid cups. I don't think so! $30 for plastic Solo cups! Crazy! I told him for that amount of money he can get a video game...he changed his mind about the cups.

Leigh of Tales from Bloggeritaville said...

I feel your pain. I had to dish out $$ on 2 sets, because my kids couldn't share (they each had to have one). I, like you tried to give them some plastic cups-but as my daughter explained, the ones I gave her did not have a little hole drilled out of the bottom of the cup, allowing the cup to easliy slide down onto another cup (for air to pass). I tried punching one, but my 9 year old didn't buy it. Thus, I "bought it". Yep, those glow in the dark neon cups with video.
The schools here actually asked that children bring their own sets to school. It was used in PE as an activity. It was all the rage. I don't get it either....
I am thinking of selling my own special spoon game, you know like the ones we all used to play as children. No you cannot use your own spoons from home-these are "special " spoons for 29.95. I'll be rich....

Sandy said...

I threw away the Big Book before the kiddoes ever saw it!

Trixie Twatwaffle said...

I want to come and sit in your kitchen.

I will bring more cups. Not 30 dollar cups, but I will bring cups.

Now can I come to your kitchen? That view??? Please?

Karen said...

No way! I never look at The Big Book, but my kids are quick to point things out. They must have missed those.

Get some glow in the dark stickers. Win the record back!

Karen said...

Uh....we got these for the kids last year. Not glow in the dark ones, just "plain" red ones. :) My son doesn't play with them too much, but my dd LOVES them. And she's very good at it.
They are also fun to take to family gatherings. Especially ones where wine is served. ;)

mommiebear2 said...

LOL! We have a 1000 of those Walmart cups for like every dang holiday. :) Have I told you lately how much your crack me up??